Author Archives: Erik
Pizza Lab #5: Thanksgiving Pizza
Pizza Lab is a fun theoretical column in which Meg A. and Erik S. explore their innermost passion for baking and eating pizzas. It exists purely for the sake of experimenting in the kitchen. It may not necessarily be cost-effective everytime, so don’t try this at home kids.
A while back on a podcast me and my friends operated, we all joked around about making a pizza for Thanksgiving. No one took it seriously. Fast-forward six months and now that pie is a reality thanks to the magic of Pizza Lab. “But Erik!”, you say, “It’s totally the beginning of freaking Summer!” you say. My reply to that is simple. Turkey is good, and gravy is magical. We shouldn’t feel guilty about partaking in such delight. So perhaps that’s the greatest merit in designing a Thanksgiving pizza, it allows you to combine all the best foods of November into one place, and not have to feel bad about doing so. Oh wait no, the greatest merit of this pizza is that it tastes fucking amazing.
Thanksgiving Pizza
Erik S. I can’t say I’ve had an overwhelming number of truly great ideas for as long as I’ve lived, but for once in my life I came up with something I could truly be proud of. It’s gonna be hard for me to top Thanksgiving Pizza. Really. That’s it, I’ve peaked at the age of 24. …I had a good run I suppose.
Meg A. It’s still better than Olympic gymnasts who peak when they’re like, 10. You had a good extra decade on them.
Erik S. Joking aside, it was a very successful pizza to say the least.
Meg A. And a nice mid-year mini-Thanksgiving to hold us out ’til the real deal. Much like Christmas in July, I think Thanksgiving in May could become a thing.
Erik S. It’s interesting to think theoretically it was several months in the making, due to the fact it required turkey meat. Somehow it took at least two month for me to select a night on which I could actually make a turkey breast despite it not being rocket science.
Meg A. Yeah, I think we were originally going to do the Thanksgiving pizza before strawberry shortcake, but didn’t have the turkey?
Erik S. Well no, I already had one turkey breast in the freezer. That’s the kicker. Just somehow, cooking a turkey went from a random dinner selection to something I ended up having to plan a week in advance.
Meg A. Well, it finally got made, so that’s the important part.
Pizza Lab #4: Strawberry Shortcake Pizza
Pizza Lab is a fun theoretical column in which Meg A. and Erik S. explore their innermost passion for baking and eating pizzas. It exists purely for the sake of experimenting in the kitchen. It may not necessarily be cost-effective everytime, so don’t try this at home kids.
After four Pizza Labs, ideally I would have liked to think our staff has reached a sort of groove, and finally come up with a method to our decision-making process involved in selecting and formulating new ideas for pizzas.
That hasn’t happened yet. Hence my use of the qualifier “ideally”.
Instead, each new edition of Pizza Lab is more thrown together than a middle school student’s Livejournal page in the year 2004. The latest one demonstrates this perfectly, reaching fruition through basically nothing more than the exclamation “Oh! Let’s make a dessert pizza!” What followed was a long debate over whether to use pudding or not. That’s really as complicated as we get. Sorry if that disappoints any budding foodologists in the audience. Know what wasn’t disappointing? This pizza.
Strawberry Shortcake Pizza
Erik S. So this was our first forray into the world of dessert pizza.
Meg A. Yep. We’ve been talking about doing a dessert pizza since starting pizza lab though. For awhile it was just kind of the abstract concept of dessert, and not a specific one though.
Erik S. Yeah, desserts is an awfully broad term, we all tend to throw it around like it means one food. i.e. “IT’S TIME FOR DESSERT!” is rarely answered with the philosophical pondering “But… what is dessert?”
Meg A. True. Until it’s time to decide on a pizza.
Erik S. Right.
Meg A. You tossed out a few ideas for what kind of dessert pizza we could do. We ultimately decided on strawberry shortcake. It made perfect sense considering that shortcake itself is a bit of a rich, doughy cake.
Erik S. Also because strawberry shortcake is my favorite type of dessert.
The Cereal Report: Post Mini Cinnamon Churros
I dunno what it is about miniature versions of things that’s awesome. All the best novelties in life are just smaller versions of stuff. Pizza Bagels, Shetland Sheepdogs, the Game Boy Micro, we can’t get enough of them. I had heard years ago of a churro-themed cereal, but never had seen it in stores until I was recently tipped off to their being in stock at a local Path Mark. During a (failed) trip to buy video games, I decided to stop in and buy this cereal as a sort of consolation prize to my inner bawling child which was hysterical at the fact every store in the area was sold out of Luigi’s Mansion.
Pizza Lab #3: Disco Fries Pizza
Pizza Lab is a fun theoretical column in which Meg A. and Erik S. explore their innermost passion for baking and eating pizzas. It exists purely for the sake of experimenting in the kitchen. It may not necessarily be cost-effective everytime, so don’t try this at home kids.
Meg A. and I are no strangers to the grotesque. Admittedly, some of our couples habits/mannerisms would probably disgust other people, so we’d like to think we’re well versed in the art of gross. One of the best and worst parts about being an adult is that you get a little more open minded though, when it comes to things which should be, and likely are awful. As you get older, certain things which sound repulsive in theory actually tend to be not bad when you give them a shot. Like portobello mushrooms, or alcohol, or going down on a human female. A few years ago at a diner, I was introduced to something which not only sounded disgusting, but even looked disgusting upon its being served. Of course, I speak of the underground delicacy, ‘disco fries’. Simply put, similar to the Canadian dish of ‘poutine’ disco fries are french fries served with melted cheese and gravy on top of them. Fortunately, one bite was enough to confirm that they were indeed delicious. Since then, I’ve been a devout fan of this heavenly meal. With the dawn of Pizza Lab, I knew that this was going to be something that would HAVE to take place.
Disco Fries Pizza
Erik S. So I was really excited for this pizza from the moment I came up with the idea. I really love Disco Fries. You’ve never actually had them though, right?
Meg A. I’ve never had disco fries, so this was really your thing. I just went with it.
Erik S. Admittedly I feel sorta bad that your first experience with them was a negative one.
Meg A. It wasn’t negative… it was…neutral.
Erik S. Well by comparison, it was negative. Like how if the first time you watched Jurassic Park it was on a 12″ television, or with a small child screaming in your ear.
The Cereal Report: Kellogg’s Caramel Crunchy Nut
Remember that glowing review I gave to Kellogg’s Crunchy Nut a few months ago? Remember how I was borderline masturbating to that cereal throughout the entire post? Well then I found out there was a new entry in the Crunchy Nut line. As you can imagine I was excited.
But then I tried it. The first mouthful was possibly one of the most disappointing moments in my entire life.




You must be logged in to post a comment.