The Cereal Report: The Return of Fruity Yummy Mummy
So Halloween is less than a week away, and spirits are high, so to speak. I can’t say whether to take that literally or metaphorically since I feel it could be misconstrued that ghosts are smoking pot. That’s entirely possible, though I’m not sure whether they’d be potheads who smoked so much weed that they continued to do so in the afterlife, or if they’re just really stressed out ghosts who were recently hooked up, in which case they’re probably the most laid back, least effective ghouls in the history of monsters. Regardless, what I meant to say is that most people I know enjoy Halloween, and those who don’t will probably be brutally murdered on the night of, for not believing or something like that. As such, it’s high-time for another Monster Cereal review which I hope will find you in due time, since these cereals will be off shelves again soon. Admittedly I’m getting kiiinda sick of them personally since it’s been my breakfast nearly everyday since late September, but hey, ’tis the season. Let’s take a gander at the final lot of the group, Fruity Yummy Mummy.
I didn’t write “The Return of Fruity Yummy Mummy” in the article title to be dramatic. That’s literally the official name of the cereal now.
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Food 101: Pantry Staples
I realized the other day that Erik and I throw around the term “pantry staples” a lot in our posts. However if you’re not one to cook all that much, or are just getting into cooking on your own, you might not be aware of what types of food we mean (and there’s nothing wrong with that!). So I’ve compiled a list of pantry staples to help give you an idea of what ingredients are good to have on hand all the time.
Food 101: How to Sauté/Pan-Fry Chicken (And deglazing too!)
Probably one of the biggest things standing in the way of people from learning to cook properly is how intimidating it seems. The culinary world borrows words from dozens of different languages and has its own set of lingo that makes no sense outside of context. As mentioned last time, dredging is usually the industrial process of collecting mud, waste, and trash from the beds of harbors, but in cooking terms it simply means coating meat in flour. It’s easy to see how one could be easily confused and overwhelmed when the neat, new recipe they’ve found calls for them to acquire fancy-ass sounding ingredients like anise extract or turmeric or herbes de provence. It’s enough to make someone immediately yell “What the hell?” and quit while they’re ahead.
“Say ‘coriander’ one more time! I triple dog dare you!”
The same goes with directions too. How do you fold a liquid batter? It’s not paper. And furthermore, “browning” your meat doesn’t mean you want it literally the color brown. Actually, one of my favorite methods of cooking is one of those fancy shmancy terms, sautéing. It sounds SO ritzy, yet it’s probably one of the simplest cooking processes out there, and is a key stepping stone to learning to cook.
Pizza Lab #10: Apple Crisp Pizza
Pizza Lab is a fun theoretical column in which Meg A. and Erik S. explore their innermost passion for baking and eating pizzas. It exists purely for the sake of experimenting in the kitchen. It may not necessarily be cost-effective everytime, so don’t try this at home kids.
It’s interesting to think there’s been ten Pizza Labs already. One a month, and we’ve got plenty more in the pipeline, trust me. That brings me to our first Fall-themed Pizza Lab! One of my favorite Fall foods/crops is apples. And actually not just Fall-wise, apples are some of my favorite food period, since they’re a delight to eat. A good apple is crisp, sweet, refreshing and juicy. Eating one is so frigging good that it’s basically like eating and drinking at the same time, considering how juicy and pleasant they are compared to some of your less juice-filled fruits (I’m looking at you, mangosteen). One perennial apple dish we all enjoy this time of year is none other than apple crisp, a delicious baked amalgamation of oats, sugar, spices, and apple slices. Which incidentally sounds way too much like some sort of stupid autumnal nursery rhyme adage, but I digress. This was the perfect opportunity to try and bring apples and pizza together in some holy-ass food matrimony.
Erik S. So we have been pretty much drowning in apples lately.
Meg A. That we have. Though I think “crushed by” is the more appropriate term since we didn’t make enough cider to drown in. But I’m pretty sure a sink full of apples would do some damage.
Erik S.This is true. And all being said, I’m not complaining either. Apples are my favorite fruit afterall.
Meg A. They are really yummy. Though actually, we had the idea for this pizza way before the onslaught of apples occurred.
Erik S. Yeah it’s going way back actually. This pizza was conceived in thought back when we were discussing our pretzel pizza.
Meg A. Yup! I’m really glad we saved it for its own pizza though.
Erik S. Yeah, it was a long time coming since apple season was months away at that point, but it was worth it. I am definitely spoiled, having an apple tree in the yard.
Meg A. You are very spoiled. Some of us actually have to leave our driveways to go get apples.
Erik S. Well I also don’t eat apples the rest of the year, so it balances out.
Meg A. I suppose.
The Poor Couple's Food Guide 
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