Author Archives: Erik
Pizza Lab #11: Limburger Pizza
Pizza Lab is a fun theoretical column in which Meg A. and Erik S. explore their innermost passion for baking and eating pizzas. It exists purely for the sake of experimenting in the kitchen. It may not necessarily be cost-effective everytime, so don’t try this at home kids.
So it’s November already, huh? What a shame Meg and I already created a Thanksgiving Pizza for Pizza Lab months ago. Hindsight may be 20/20, but now that I’m trying to look back, I can’t exactly remember the rationale in making a Thanksgiving-themed pizza back in the springtime… No matter. Time marches on, and so does Meg and I’s experimenting on all things food. If you recall, Meg recently gave her positive thoughts on everybody’s favorite stinky cheese, limburger. Being unabashedly weird and having a fondness for various weird things, the two of us knew we couldn’t settle with just the one review and call it a day. Instead, we surmised the possibility of a Pizza Lab involving the limburger and give it a send off worthy of our new favorite cheese.
Meg A. Once we realized there’d be leftover Limburger from our cheese adventure, we knew we had to use it on a pizza. We are us after all.
Erik S. Haha yeah, just trying limburger wasn’t enough, heh.
Meg A. Yet despite knowing for about a month we wanted to make this pizza, we kinda put the plans for it together rather slapdash. I fear we let the limburger down a bit.
Erik S. Yeah, we had a loose idea of a pizza, but it was literally the night before we made it, that we actually made a solid plan. Despite how some of our pizzas may look, we do generally put a lot of thought into them.
Meg A. Yeah, this one… we sorta dropped the ball on. We’ve been busy! Bah. Stupid lives and responsibilities we have. It should all just be baking pizza.
Erik S. Oh God I wish… It really should.
Meg A. But even with the relative lack of planning, the pizza still turned out pretty darn good! It has the potential to be my 5th favorite savory pizza we made. Pretty much the only thing keeping it from that was the unfortunate use of maple bacon.
Erik S. Yeah, once again bacon screwed us over in a Pizza Lab. We put too much faith in it for the Disco Fries pizza, and now this time it messed up our Limburger pizza.
Meg A. What makes it even worse is that in retrospect we probably didn’t even really need it. The few strips of regular we had would likely have been enough.
Erik S. Yeah… lesson learned for next time.
The Cereal Report: The Return of Fruity Yummy Mummy
So Halloween is less than a week away, and spirits are high, so to speak. I can’t say whether to take that literally or metaphorically since I feel it could be misconstrued that ghosts are smoking pot. That’s entirely possible, though I’m not sure whether they’d be potheads who smoked so much weed that they continued to do so in the afterlife, or if they’re just really stressed out ghosts who were recently hooked up, in which case they’re probably the most laid back, least effective ghouls in the history of monsters. Regardless, what I meant to say is that most people I know enjoy Halloween, and those who don’t will probably be brutally murdered on the night of, for not believing or something like that. As such, it’s high-time for another Monster Cereal review which I hope will find you in due time, since these cereals will be off shelves again soon. Admittedly I’m getting kiiinda sick of them personally since it’s been my breakfast nearly everyday since late September, but hey, ’tis the season. Let’s take a gander at the final lot of the group, Fruity Yummy Mummy.
I didn’t write “The Return of Fruity Yummy Mummy” in the article title to be dramatic. That’s literally the official name of the cereal now.
Food 101: How to Sauté/Pan-Fry Chicken (And deglazing too!)
Probably one of the biggest things standing in the way of people from learning to cook properly is how intimidating it seems. The culinary world borrows words from dozens of different languages and has its own set of lingo that makes no sense outside of context. As mentioned last time, dredging is usually the industrial process of collecting mud, waste, and trash from the beds of harbors, but in cooking terms it simply means coating meat in flour. It’s easy to see how one could be easily confused and overwhelmed when the neat, new recipe they’ve found calls for them to acquire fancy-ass sounding ingredients like anise extract or turmeric or herbes de provence. It’s enough to make someone immediately yell “What the hell?” and quit while they’re ahead.
“Say ‘coriander’ one more time! I triple dog dare you!”
The same goes with directions too. How do you fold a liquid batter? It’s not paper. And furthermore, “browning” your meat doesn’t mean you want it literally the color brown. Actually, one of my favorite methods of cooking is one of those fancy shmancy terms, sautéing. It sounds SO ritzy, yet it’s probably one of the simplest cooking processes out there, and is a key stepping stone to learning to cook.
Pizza Lab #10: Apple Crisp Pizza
Pizza Lab is a fun theoretical column in which Meg A. and Erik S. explore their innermost passion for baking and eating pizzas. It exists purely for the sake of experimenting in the kitchen. It may not necessarily be cost-effective everytime, so don’t try this at home kids.
It’s interesting to think there’s been ten Pizza Labs already. One a month, and we’ve got plenty more in the pipeline, trust me. That brings me to our first Fall-themed Pizza Lab! One of my favorite Fall foods/crops is apples. And actually not just Fall-wise, apples are some of my favorite food period, since they’re a delight to eat. A good apple is crisp, sweet, refreshing and juicy. Eating one is so frigging good that it’s basically like eating and drinking at the same time, considering how juicy and pleasant they are compared to some of your less juice-filled fruits (I’m looking at you, mangosteen). One perennial apple dish we all enjoy this time of year is none other than apple crisp, a delicious baked amalgamation of oats, sugar, spices, and apple slices. Which incidentally sounds way too much like some sort of stupid autumnal nursery rhyme adage, but I digress. This was the perfect opportunity to try and bring apples and pizza together in some holy-ass food matrimony.
Erik S. So we have been pretty much drowning in apples lately.
Meg A. That we have. Though I think “crushed by” is the more appropriate term since we didn’t make enough cider to drown in. But I’m pretty sure a sink full of apples would do some damage.
Erik S.This is true. And all being said, I’m not complaining either. Apples are my favorite fruit afterall.
Meg A. They are really yummy. Though actually, we had the idea for this pizza way before the onslaught of apples occurred.
Erik S. Yeah it’s going way back actually. This pizza was conceived in thought back when we were discussing our pretzel pizza.
Meg A. Yup! I’m really glad we saved it for its own pizza though.
Erik S. Yeah, it was a long time coming since apple season was months away at that point, but it was worth it. I am definitely spoiled, having an apple tree in the yard.
Meg A. You are very spoiled. Some of us actually have to leave our driveways to go get apples.
Erik S. Well I also don’t eat apples the rest of the year, so it balances out.
Meg A. I suppose.
The Cereal Report: The Return of Fruit Brute
I’ll be the first to admit I’m a big kid at heart. Not quite a manchild, on account of the negative connotation it brings, but I do spend the majority of my free time playing video games and watching cartoons. A good example of this reigns in my recent discovery that Monster Cereals were back in stores for the season. After a particularly gruesome ambulance call, I departed the fire department when getting home, and needed to deposit money into the bank. Immediately following this I saw the Halloween section of Pathmark and proceeded to buy three boxes of cartoon-monster themed cereals, since that’s what all people working as first responders do after leaving work. I also bought a Super Mario Bros. game too, but that’s just pouring it on at this point. You get the idea.
It helps me unwind. That and whiskey. Preferably together.
Interestingly enough, after resurrecting (no pun intended, I swear) Frankenberry and Booberry a few years ago, General Mills brought back Fruit Brute and Yummy Mummy for this Halloween. That’s fairly awesome for all of us people born after 1984 when it was discontinued. So pull up a chair and feel important! This is the first time in almost three decades Fruit Brute has been on shelves.
The Poor Couple's Food Guide 
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