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The Cereal Report: Strawberry Tiny Toast

So by now I’m sure everyone and their mom has heard that General Mills brought back the much-beloved French Toast Crunch about two years ago, and I’m happy about it for the most part. (Though honestly, the cereal tends to be a little bit pricey, so sadly I haven’t been eating it as much as I’d like to.) In the last year, the big GM released two new cereals in a brand new subline known as Tiny Toast, in what I assume is mostly an effort to justify keeping manufacturing French Toast Crunch, since the machine that produces tiny little toast-shaped cereals now has more than one specific purpose. Similar to French Toast Crunch, these are tiny little toast cereal pieces with sugar and fruit specks. So far they’ve got both strawberry and blueberry, and we managed to pick up a box relatively cheap recently at a local liquidation store.

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The Snack Report: Quaker’s Safari Animals Oatmeal

In Meg and I’s ongoing quest to pretend we’re adults, we continue to fail in glorious, brilliant, new ways, ranging from tickle fights that lead to broken noses, to cookies ending up in someone’s underwear. This last week however we had another sterling display of why we’re both mentally 8 years old. While preparing for a party we were throwing, we ended up running late. In the process of buying some last minute groceries for said party, we walked into a store and told ourselves “Okay. We’re gonna be late for our own party. Let’s make this quick; we can’t get distracted.”

About two minutes in, we ended up sidetracked in the cereal aisle marveling at Batman VS Superman cereals, and then were stopped dead in our tracks mesmerized because there’s a new version of that dinosaur oatmeal, now featuring safari animals.

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Editor’s Note: Meg has a Master’s degree from a top-ranked art design school, and I am certified by the State of New York to purchase dangerous chemicals and transport dying people to hospitals.

 

 

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The Cereal Report: Holiday Sprinkles Cookie Crunch

The Cereal Report is a column in which PCFG conducts various cereal reviews, of new or limited products, as well as providing brief backgrounds on the cereal. Cereal is delicious and fairly cheap as far as meals go. Everyone should eat cereal!

The other day we took a look at Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch, a pretty awesome, worthy cereal. General Mills releases it around Christmastime each year in tandem with another festively-themed breakfast food, Holiday Sprinkles Cookie Crunch. Unlike its brethren unfortunately, this one isn’t quite as good.

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The Cereal Report: Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch

The Cereal Report is a column in which PCFG conducts various cereal reviews, of new or limited products, as well as providing brief backgrounds on the cereal. Cereal is delicious and fairly cheap as far as meals go. Everyone should eat cereal!

Obviously there’s been a stupid number of food companies taking advantage of the “limited edition” hype train the past couple of years, though I have to say that one niche was left out of the mix was Christmas editions. Especially cereals. Outside of Cap’n Crunch’s Christmas Crunch, there’s not really any Christmas-themed breakfast cereals I can think of. Lo and behold however, General Mills came to the rescue and added two special editions of two of their biggest IPs: Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Cookie Crisp. This review will focus on the former, which gave us Sugar Cookie Toast Crunch.

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Christmastime Favorite: How To Make Wassail Pt. 1

About 10 years ago, I found myself at a Christmas party at a local department/craft store with my mother, where they were serving this mystical drink known as “wassail”. It was some sort of mystery concoction made of apple cider, spices, and other fruits. Back then I was too young to drink hard cider, so plain old pure cider was my favorite thing to drink; I had pretty high expectations for this weird brew of fruit juices and spices I’d never heard of. To be frank, I got my shit rocked. Wassail was one of the greatest things I’d ever drunk and it had launched a sequence of events that guaranteed Christmas would never be the same after that.

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I can’t believe how much that last sentence makes this sound like the opening monologue of some awful Disney channel high-school movie about Christmas vacation.

 

 

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