PSA: Hold It!! Do NOT Throw Out Your Pumpkins! They’re Literally Food.
Alright, maybe this seems a bit obvious to people out there who cook with pumpkin at home. But tragically, year after year we see the most despicable of Fall-crimes: throwing away pumpkins.
But let us make this very clear, here: pumpkins are FOOD. They’re not just decorations. They’re a healthy, delicious foodstuff that you can use as decorations, but that’s the best part, after they’re done you can freaking eat these things!
Okay, so sometimes people don’t always throw their pumpkins in the trash the day after Halloween (though truth be told, I’ve seen this actually happen). Sometimes people just let them sorta rot away on their porches for weeks and then throw them out. Or some people throw them out into the woods to give to animals, though that option is much more acceptable since it’s at least being returned to nature. But let’s be real here, you wouldn’t just throw an extra sandwich out to the squirrels, so why a perfectly good pumpkin?
Oh and to all you edgelord teenagers out there, smashing pumpkins isn’t rebellious or badass. It’s wasteful and it makes you an asshole because you could be eating it, and everyone knows teenagers are ravenous knuckleheads that love to shove food into their fat faces.
Pumpkins are pretty easy to cook with and can be boiled, microwaved, or roasted to prepare for consumption. You can find tons of recipes out there for pumpkins. On top of that, they’re really good for you as well, containing high amounts of beta carotene, Vitamin A, and Vitamin C, though that should come as no surprise since basically all orange foods are good for you (except for Cheetohs unfortunately). Obviously, the smaller sugar pumpkins are more useful for food purposes since they’re sweeter and have more flesh, however even larger pumpkins are great to cook with.
Here’s some examples of things you can do with your unused pumpkins, post-Halloween.
Roasting Pumpkin, To Make Homemade Puree
Pumpkin Bread and Pumpkin Muffins
Savory Pumpkin Spread
Pumpkin Pulled Chicken Pizza
Pumpkin Oatmeal Smoothie
So yeah, all those uncarved pumpkins, and little sugar pumpkins you got lying around on your counters and tables? Start cookin’ ’em. And it doesn’t have to be a mindful, environmentalist perspective either, if that offends you for some reason. At very least, consider the fact that you spent money on the damned things. The least you can do is get your money’s worth by eating it, instead of just letting them rot away into December. Hell, donate them to a food pantry charity so at least someone can eat them.
And if you’re already among the pumpkenlightened, please spread the word so that fewer pumpkins get wasted. Pumpkins are awesome!