The Cereal Report: French Toast Crunch Returns At Last Pt. 1
Ten years… it’s been almost ten long years since General Mills discontinued one of the greatest cereals of all time. A cereal which not only tasted great, but also had a really fun novelty and gimmick. A cereal which produced exceptional cereal-milk. And a cereal which was pretty good for you as far as sweet ones go. I speak of course of French Toast Crunch…
About one month ago, the big GM announced they had plans to resurrect the long-gone cereal, and at long last, French Toast Crunch is back on shelves. Words can’t express what a glorious time this is for mankind. Naturally, I sought it out as soon as possible because this was going to be one of the most important Cereal Report entries this website may ever see. We live on Long Island, and it took a couple weeks for it to make it here, but now it should be readily accessible in grocery stores like Path-Mark, Shop Rite, Waldbaum’s and others…
Where do I even start with this cereal… Well how about it’s actually shaped like little pieces of toast?!
Look at this shit! It’s magic! It’s a teeny tiny little slice of french toast! Down to every little detail. It’s got the right shape. The outsides are colored to be brown like real crust, and the face itself is sorta yellow-tinged on account of the egg used on the real thing. And dammit, it even has little specks of cinnamon on it. How? What kind of machine produces this masterpiece? Is it even a machine? Or do they just have a bunch of little hamsters running a miniature kitchen, where they just cook these all day. Alright alright alright, joking aside, it really is impressive, and this cereal would be great even on aesthetics alone.
So let’s talk flavor now. Because even if it’s really cool-looking, you still need to have a tasty cereal. Hell, there’s a decent number of cereals that try really hard to look like a miniature item, without actually tasting like the real thing (I’m looking at you, Cookie Crisp) so the concept isn’t brand new. But French Toast Crunch also pulls off the flavor department perfectly as well.
The predominant flavor of French Toast Crunch is suppose to mimic maple syrup. It does a really good job of that considering maple is kind of a really unique taste on its own. Interestingly enough, despite being a sweet, kiddie kinda cereal, it’s actually quite a bit less sweet than real maple syrup. And that’s okay, since sugary cereals have enough of the stuff in them. To be quite honest though, FTC really isn’t that sweet. It’s got more of a pleasant tang to it. And one thing that is pretty cool is that those little cinnamon specks I mentioned earlier aren’t just for show, it’s real cinnamon which you can actually taste. Props to them for writing “naturally flavored” on the box, and actually meaning it.
In addition to tasting great on its own and in milk, it also produces great cereal-milk, one of the other important traits which I use to assess cereals. The milk takes on the same pleasant flavor the cereal has, but the creaminess the milk adds is just so freaking good, with such an awesome mellow flavor. Really, at the risk of sounding absurdly cliched, it’s good to the last drop.
Oh, and don’t hold me to it since I’m not a total expert on the subject, but I actually think French Toast Crunch might actually be gluten-free as well. Most of the ingredients are corn, and it doesn’t have the “Contains wheat” warning on its nutritional info. This cereal just gets better and better because even people with Celiac Disease should be able to eat it too.
I could go on and on about this stuff forever. I really could. That’s why I’m wrapping this whole big spiel up in a second post. For the first time ever in The Cereal Report, we’ve got a two-parter. But for now, I’ll just finish this first part up the way we always do at PCFG.
Should you eat French Toast Crunch?
Want to try it for yourself? Follow our Amazon Associate link!